Movie Day

Today was a really easy day. I did almost no teaching, watched a movie all day, and the two most annoying teachers at the school were both absent. Doesn’t get much better than that.

I was informed this morning that I wouldn’t be doing any testing. The English teacher took care of the makeups for the day, and I was asked to hold my homeroom for the entire three hours before lunch. This meant that I would be spending my morning with the likes of Jam Master Jay, Psycho T, Slim, Lady Cheaterly, The Boy with the Tattooed Hands, Hand Cramps, Big White Kid, The Great Black Hope, Tony Montana, Check Slapper, and a slew of others. I really have come up with a lot of nicknames.

The Social Studies teacher suggested that I show a movie so I didn’t have to monitor what websites the kids were going on, which is generally a problem. The Science teacher let me borrow a handful. I gave the kids the option between Remember the Titans, Rudy, and Dead Poet’s Society. As expected, an overwhelming majority wanted to watch Remember the Titans.

The only real issue I had with my morning was trying to get the damned VCR player to work. I later found out that the custodian that had connected it hadn’t put a plug all the way in to the TV (that’s right, I am diffusing responsibility). It probably took 20-25 minutes from the time that my students had walked through the door until we started the movie.

The kids seemed pretty engaged with the film. I had to redirect Psycho T, Slim, and Lady Cheaterly a few times, but other than that, there really weren’t any issues. Psycho T once told me that she was afraid to watch the movie because it was making her “angry and racist”. She also screamed out loud when Gary Bertier (white linebacker) got in a car accident towards the end of the movie.

The Boy with the Tattooed Hands was once again being shadowed by his mother. He clearly had seen the movie several times as he was quoting much of it quietly in his desk. There was a point when he began to curse, before looking at his mother and catching himself. After he said, “Motherfuh,” he looked over to me and I just stared at him for a minute before shifting my eyes back to the screen. I guarantee that if his mom wasn’t there, the “ck” would have been. I am not sure if she is required to shadow him for the rest of the year, but it would be nice.

The movie got done around 10:30, which meant I had to hold the students for 30 more minutes before lunch. I told them that they could go on the computers. I also wrote a possible extra credit assignment on the board, which dealt with writing a one page paper about a career which uses mathematics. I told them I had more worksheet packets as well. A few of the students do have a legitimate chance of getting out of here if they raise their grades a bit. I want to help them, but I am not going to just boost everybody up. There needs to be some sort of effort shown.

Psycho T, who had impressed me so much the day before, decided to spend her time looking at shoes on the internet. I repeated myself several times, saying, “This is a great opportunity for any of you that are worried about improving your grade in my class to get some extra credit.” Sadly, The Great Black Hope was the only person to really take advantage of the opportunity. She has a 96% in my class, so I don’t think she needs it too badly. The Boy with the Tattooed Hands scribbled a few answers down at his mother’s request, but he spent most of his time playing games on the computer. As I once said, “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink, and you can lead a man to the truth, but you can’t make him think.”

Even though I knew I couldn’t finish a movie in a single class period, I decided to keep the cruise control on for the rest of the day. Allowing students to go on the computers can become a lot of work because the kids are constantly trying to get on websites they aren’t supposed to be on. Instead, I was able to kick my feet back a bit and watch with them. Granted, it isn’t quite as good the second time through for the day. It also doesn’t help that I’ve seen that movie atleast ten times.

Suit Man was a bit disappointed that I wouldn’t let him go on the computer, but he cheered up and attempted to explain the theme of the movie (bringing people of different races together). Teletubby appeared to be upset at the beginning of the movie, claiming, “They is all ignorant. I will set them straight.” He also didn’t understand why people were upset when the white coach lost his job. Later, when Sunshine (quarterback) kissed Gary Bertier (linebacker), he said, “Oh, no. He don’t like him.” I wonder how much Teletubby knows about football. It is certainly less than he knows about kissing boys.

Teletubby asked about his candy several times and also asked me if I liked his orange and turquoise striped socks. After I called them “fabulous”, he just smiled and said, “Yessss, I know!” He lost interest in the movie quickly and began thumbing through some computer-printed pictures. When I called him over to see what they were, I noticed that he was looking at dozens of pictures of painted nails. I just said, “Okay,” and let him return to his desk. I didn’t even want to know anything further beyond what I had already seen.

I am happy to report that for the first time since he has been here, Sleeping Beauty stayed awake for the entire class period. He must like that movie.

The movie philosophy didn’t end up working as much during fifth period. While lining the kids up outside my door, Linda Blair immediately began asking about going on the computers. When she discovered we would be watching a movie instead, she was none too happy. I didn’t acknowledge her cries of “why”. Instead, I was focusing on Ho Man, who was at the front of the line. It looked like there was a bit of water under his eye. I asked him what he was crying about. He responded, “I just so happy to see you.” Unfortunately, I was the only teacher in the entire school happy to see him.

Ho Man was a bit of a surprise today because I didn’t think he’d be there. His step-sister spent much of her time in the office with her mother, my uncle, and Slowhand. Enter the quote of the day. Let me preface it by reminding you that Ho Man’s sister had gotten in a fight yesterday. Furthermore, the fight had nothing to do with a boy. Slowhand, prepared to give advice, said the following:

“Nah…you gon’ be a woman…soon…and you gon’ find yoself a man…nah…maybe another woman gonna come to yo house…tryin’ to take yo man…and that should tell you…that yo man…probably ain’t worth fightin’ over. What you think ‘bout that?”

Apparently, nobody thought much, because it was met with silence. I wish I could have been there. My uncle told me that he had to bite his lip.

Very few students paid any attention to the movie. The Mouth was busy chatting away in the back of the room, albeit excitedly because she wanted to see “Denzel’s sexy self”. She did say that she missed me (she had been absent for a couple of days) and told me she would bring me the ultrasound she took yesterday. Apparently, The Rapist is going to jail. The Mouth told me that he was charged with something and she was asked to testify against him. I don’t even want to know. She also made a statement which I questioned (can’t remember what it was), and she informed me that she would never lie to me. She then added that she’d lie to three of the four other high school teachers because she “hates them”. Atleast somebody loves me.

The Mouth did lose it a bit after Onepac called her a “piece of shit”. She whipped a marker at his head. I should have kicked them both out, but I just gave them checks, which they graciously accepted. The Mouth continued to talk, but wasn’t much of a distraction, while Onepac moved up by Ho Man and focused on the movie.

Jamaican Mon was in the back of the room with Onepac’s sister, chatting away. I have lost patience with him and asked him to move. He glared at me for a solid five seconds before getting out of his seat. He continued to complain, telling me that I “was trippin’.” I handed him a check, which he continued to complain about. “I didn’t do anything.”

Onepac’s sister was also a bit of a problem. I moved her to the front of the room, which ended up being a bad move, because she was close to Jamaican Mon again and Skinny Kid came in a bit late and sat down two seats behind her (he tried to make it one, but I wouldn’t let him). When they continued talking through the movie, I gave all three checks. Skinny Kid asked if he could talk about it later, while Jamaican Mon repeated himself, saying, “I didn’t do anything.” I responded by saying, “You never do.” After he told me to shut up, I told him to write it for ten. I didn’t throw him out, but he must have gotten kicked out of his homeroom, because he ended up in FLC by the end of the day.

Linda Blair and TB spent their time playing hangman with one another. I sense a little romance brewing, although TB allegedly has a girlfriend and Linda Blair’s boyfriend is in jail. TB later denied any relationship with Linda Blair. We’ll see what the future holds.

Ho Man was the only student in that class who did what he was supposed to do. He originally wanted to watch Rudy until he saw that I had another choice. He has also seen the movie several times and incorrectly quoted some favorite phrases. He burst out into “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough” on cue, clenching his fist to form a faux microphone and swaying his head from side to side. Towards the end of class, I handed him a note saying that I’d bring him a candy bar tomorrow because he followed directions and was quiet during the movie. The note also thanked him for doing what he was supposed to do. After reading it, which took him probably two minutes, he folded it up and put it in his wallet before getting back to the movie.

I let my homeroom go on the computers, but I also encouraged them to work on the extra credit opportunities that I provided. Several students wrote down the instructions for the short report, but they didn’t do anything about it. I spent my time going over parts of the worksheets with The Boy with the Tattooed Hands and The Great Black Hope.

It is a bit frustrating because I know that most of my students won’t do anything about their grades. They think that they can put it off and put it off, but they will eventually run out of time. I told them I needed everything handed in by next Friday. Honestly, I have always been a procrastinator. Still am. But I am also really good at gauging what I need to get done and how long it will take me. These kids have no clue, and they will end up getting burned. I have said to students several times, “Remember this moment. Look back on this moment when you don’t get what you want, when you don’t pass, and remember this choice that you made.”

All in all, it was an incredibly boring day. I made money for showing the same movie the entire time. Not difficult. It did make me look at a few things that I never thought of before, though. I didn’t feel like watching Remember the Titans. I don’t think it is a bad movie, but it is extremely clichéd and I’ve seen it too many times. However, the decision in my classes was almost unanimous that it be the movie we watch. I predicted it, and I can understand why.

I think I have an eclectic taste in films. However, almost all of the movies I watch are predominantly white. They star mostly white actors with white directors and white storylines. I watch movies that relate to my life and my struggles. It is completely understandable that my students look for the same things (ability to connect to the characters) in movies that I do. 95% of Hollywood is trying to cater to a white audience. It must be frustrating for these kids to go to a movie theater and not feel like they have many (or any) choices as far as watching movies that relate to their lives’. It is no wonder that they cheered a little bit louder for the black characters at the beginning of the movie.

Tomorrow will probably be much the same. I think that after tomorrow, the numbers will plummet. Technically, students won’t need to come to school again after that to avoid truancy court (this is why many of them come to school in the first place). It might be more tears tomorrow for Ho Man.